Jillian Approved: Humor, News and Nonsense

Hey everybody! Welcome to my new site. Go ahead, have a look around… I’m in no hurry.

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You done?

Good! Took you long enough.

I’m kidding. :-p

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1. “You’re gay.”- I really like this one because whoever this is directed at can’t possibly prove otherwise. Sure, they might be straight and get “lots of play”, but the people laughing at their expense don’t care. If you’re a guy, this is especially harmful. Once someone introduces the idea you enjoy ’sausage parties’, your credibility on the subject is forfeit (even if you have 2000+ posts in the forum *cough* loser *cough*). If you’re the type who thinks quick on your feet, responding with a ‘Dad joke’ can be a saving grace.

Example:

2Cool4Skool: You’re gay!
FckngAwesme: Let’s not bring your Dad into this.

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Looks like Blog Catalog published my guest post, “It Happens to the Best of Us“! If time permits, please give it the once over! As usual, feedback is always appreciated!

**Scroll down for my latest post: The Case of the Missing Prophylactic; Part 2**

What’s this? You didn’t read the first part? Go HERE and get caught up!

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God, he drives slow. Amanda glanced at Dave from the passenger seat and made a face. Why hadn’t she noticed his annoying driving skills before? Just how blind had she been this past year? Fuck! I doubt he’s ever driven faster than 50mph.

“Do you ever drive faster than 50? People keep going around because you aren’t going fast enough.”

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**The following story is true in its ENTIRETY as told to me. Names have been changed to protect the innocent and easily embarrassed. Stuff like this will probably not be a regular feature on this blog, but I thought it was something worth sharing. I hope you enjoy (and don’t grade me too harshly on punctuation) And don’t worry, I have obtained permission to share this. Also, the content is adult in nature. You’ve been warned!**

“Ooooo yeah… I’m so close…. ahhhhh….”

I hope he’s almost done, I’m hungry… Once again Amanda would go unsatisfied, she was beginning to think these things called orgasms just did not exist. As much as people talked about them, surely she should have had one by now. Fuck, she thought, this was about as fun as stapling my eyelids shut. Her mom told her it was supposed to get better, that when two people were together for the first time sometimes the “rhythm” was… off. If her count was correct (and it should be, since one isn’t inclined to forget less-than-stellar bedroom activities), this would mark the 7th time Dave has “made it” without bringing her along. Why do I even bother? If other people are having this kind of sex, why in the world are they so happy about it?

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