It’s a Bit Dusty in Here
*Dusts off her keyboard*
I recently read somewhere that websites live and die by their update schedule. If that’s the case, then this website is something of a zombie. Officially it’s dead, but I enjoy giving it just enough juice to reanimate for a while. Clearly I have not been the least bit interested in updating this thing, but something in me demands I keep paying the monthly host fees to keep it online. Weird, huh? I am both attracted to this site and yet repelled. The attraction is easy to explain. This site is full of original pieces (except for a few guest posts). I love everything on here. This is the biggest body of written material I have, and dammit, I’m proud of it. I’m proud of the fact I can write about ‘dookie‘ and ‘sex‘ and ‘tigolebitties‘ – three things I have a load of experience in.
Wait. Is this true?
But as for what repels me though: I suspect it’s the sweet glaze of laziness coating my life. It’s a constant struggle to do ANYTHING. Everything just seems to be such a chore. Work is a chore. Cleaning up is a chore. Looking for a better job (so I can achieve even more mediocrity) is a chore. And a lot of times, writing is a chore. So I don’t know, either I’m in some kind of funk (and have been for the last 26 years) or something is genuinely wrong with me. Now I’m not quick to toss out words like “depression” or “loser”, but something is going on with me. Hopefully it’s just a case of “Toomuchawesomeitis”. If you don’t know what that is, now is the time to seriously rethink your Internet usage.
In other news, Entrecard recently closed my account with them. Apparently when you don’t update your blog in 90 days they pull the plug. I know I shouldn’t be upset, but do you know how long it took me to amass over 20,000 credits?! And just when I was planning to launch a huge comeback, too! Oh well. I’m not going back, though. I was never good at dropping credits and honestly, I don’t see how people have time for it. Is there really a need for dropping credits, Facebooking, MySpacing, and Tweeting all in the same day? Think: all this in addition to being human. No thanks. My relationship with Entrecard has ended (they dumped me), I closed my MySpace account (this of my own accord, thank you very much), and anyone “following” me on Twitter knows I almost never update. I could at least say I was behind the idea of Entrecard, but I still don’t see the point of Twitter. I know a lot of people are having success with it… even famous people are on there now. But even though I might like you, I really don’t care what the hell you’re doing at 3:21 in the afternoon. I don’t even care what my husband is doing at 3:21 in the afternoon. So… yeah.
However, I do Facebook. I find this site is a good way to keep in touch with the people that linger on the fringes of our lives. You know who I’m talking about. Facebook lets you talk to people you’re kinda sorta interested in, but not enough to actually call or hang out with. And if you’re anything like me, some of these people might include family. So I’m not giving up on social networking completely, but I am going to pick one and stick with it.
Until next time! Which, believe it or not, will be soon! 
**Photo courtesy of atp_tyreseus**
22 Responses for "It’s a Bit Dusty in Here"
It lives!
I love twitter and twitter loves me… or something. I just like it.
I can be so lazy sometimes… I like to think it’s good for the soul.
Cxx
Claire – I think laziness is my Kryptonite.
Wanna hear something really freaky? Drawing on what you said above; “The attraction is easy to explain. This site is full of original pieces (except for a few guest posts). I love everything on here. This is the biggest body of written material I have, and dammit, I’m proud of it.”
I wonder, is this how God (our Father in heaven) thinks about us? Are we His blogs, in a internet that we can no more see, than our own blogs?
“I am both attracted to this site and yet repelled.” you said. And how could you not be? This site, is Your creation! Yet, it is More than that. Go back through your post and what you will find is, you. Your spirit, your soul, everything you are, is in here. This blog, is you. And yes, while it may do things to piss you off, you will always love it. You can’t help yourself! I know because i feel the same way about my blog. I just didn’t relize until i read your words that, that must be the way God feels about us. His Blogs.
And yeah, i know that all sounds freaky. But then, You’re the one who talks about their blog as thought it were a person. So don’t judge me for making the comparison. And Don’t Stop Blogging! You might miss yourself.
The person above is right. They do sound freaky; but not in the kind of way you want to get them drunk so they’ll get their freak on with you kind of freaky. No. No. This is a different kind of freaky altogether. We are all God’s blogs? Holy fuck. Was that in the Really New Testament?
Anyway, I agree with everything you say up there (no, not Heaven); especially the suffering of “toomuchawesomeitis”. I’ve actually been officially diagnosed and am now taking medication. As is generally the case, however, I’ve been taking too much medication and am now suffering the side effects of painful mediocrity.
I’m gonna look up your Facebook now. Maybe we can participate in some gay role playing game where we’re rival zombies or garbagemen or some shit.
Hope you’re well.
-II-
I think everyone needs breaks from blogging, I am just not exciting enough to have anything to write about on a daily basis haha
what! a blog post! *gasp*
Although I do get my Jillian “fix” on facebook, I truly miss your blog posts!
Are you a professional journalist? You write very well.
@ Arsento – I wish! Can people really get paid for writing? Nooo.
Hmm… I read blogs on a similar topic, but i never visited your blog. I added it to favorites and i’ll be your constant reader.
You and Mr.45 hath forsaken me
This is a test
Hi Jillian! Long time no see! You’re still alive and we too are still alive. Greetings and salutations.
BE STILL MY HEART! A NEW POST FROM JILLIAN!!! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
@Roufa and Mimi: Yup, I’m alive and kicking… just living life and trying to prosper!
@meleah rebeccah: Hahaha, I am working on it! I gotta bring this site back to its former glory! Yay!
and I will be reading/checking for updates DAILY!!!
told you I would check for updates every day!
just checking!
twas hoping for a new post
So twas I Meleah, so twas I.
Happy Xmas for last year, this year and next year
Still checking for a new post!!
Wishing You A Safe & Happy New Year!
Wow, great blog. I had to track you down after I saw your thread comment:
“I read the Book of Revelations and it seems like you have to be on the good drugs to understand it.” Great, great. That went right into my Favorite Quote File.
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