I mean really, I do watch TV after all.

Time Warner has new commercials. And their new catch-phrase? “We think like you think.”

Ummm… no.

I think when a person pays for a service, the shit should work. Plain and simple. Time Warner, on the other hand, thinks the customer should be satisfied with whatever scraps of service are tossed their way.

I think it’s insane to make customers wait on hold for 30 minutes before someone can help them. And by help I mean be completely fucking useless. I already restarted my computer. I’ve unplugged the router 9 times already. Yup, pretty sure the modem is plugged into the wall. Oh, everything looks fine on your end? Wow, thanks!

Time Warner, I don’t believe you. Where do you get the balls to say something like that? Running ads depicting customers close to murderous rages would be closer to the truth.

How about showing people waiting for cable installations that never show up, or you can show the technician installing the wrong kind of cable box and the customer not realizing the mistake until the Tech is long gone. You can also show their livid faces when they find out they have to wait another 2 weeks for someone else to come out.

“We think like you think.” Yeah, only if you think you suck.

Satellite, though I’m married to Time Warner, it’s you I dream of at night.

*****

THING OF THE DAY:

From xkcd:

But let me share with you my girl-crush:

Her name is Gina Carano. While some of you might know her as “Crush” from the newly styled “American Gladiators”, I know her from her role as a mentor on the show “Fight Girls” (”Fight Girls” was a show that followed a select group of women as they trained and later fought for a Muy Thai Championship). Gina’s current Muy Thai record is 12-1-1 and her MMA record is currently 5-0 (a shout out to wikipedia. So not only is she insanely hot, she kicks ass to boot!

Seriously… she DOES set a standard (and WHAT a standard it is!).

Gina, you’re beautiful AND awesome. Right on!

NOTE TO SELF: …. must hit gym.

*****
Looks like yesterday’s picks were all kinds of wrong! San Diego beat Indianapolis 28-24 and the Giants beat the Cowboys 21-17. WOW! I’ve heard that anything can happen in the post-season and so far that’s turning out to be no mere rumor. I didn’t think the Giants had a chance against the Cowboys. I know I’m not a Giants fan, but I do have a soft spot for E-Man, and you know what? Even though I didn’t pick him and his team for the win, I’ll offer my congratulations anyway: Congratulations! As unlikely as it seems (or does it?), I wouldn’t mind seeing E-Man and his team get to the SB and even win the damn thing.

Blah blah Chargers and Colts blah blah (this isn’t ESPN, dammit).

Next week are the CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIP GAMES! Will the Giants triumph over the Packers? Highly unlikely, but props for making it this far. Does San Diego have a chance against the Pats? Me thinks not. I pretty much see the Pats as an indestructible machine rolling over the opposition; although Jacksonville DID manage to get them on edge for a bit. Who knows? If the Chargers can score first and get in their head, the game might indeed be interesting.

****
Just to let you guys know: Time Warner arrived on Saturday when they said they would and took a look at our internet. Apparently, (as was explained to me) our modem was receiving TOO MUCH signal (don’t ask me) which caused it to act extremely gay. It turns out that everyone in our apartment uses the same cable line. This cable line has a sort of hierarchy: those at the top get faster better service (the shit you’re paying for) and those at the bottom get spotty crappy service (the shit you’re paying for, but shouldn’t be). So here is TW’s solution:

Every time someone in our building calls to complain about their service (whether it be cable or internet), a technician comes out and moves said customer from the bottom of the multimedia “food” chain to the top. Problem solved… except now some other poor bastard that was enjoying a high-speed working connection gets bumped down and screwed. *Sigh* And so it goes… Right now we are at the top; the service is faster than ever and I’m happily zooming through cyberspace unhindered. I just wonder how long it will last this time.

*****

THING OF THE DAY:

From Bridget Jones’s Diary:

Interviewer: What do you think about the El Nino phenomenon?
Bridget: It’s a blip. Latin music’s on its way out.

The internet wasn’t working for most of the day… again. We (hubby and I) turned off our computers and unplugged and reset the modem several times. None of that worked, so we called “tech support”. I put “tech support” in quotations because it’s a laughable term in relation to Time Warner.

I love that when you call TW, the first thing they have you do is unplug and reset your modem… like you haven’t already done that 107510595 times. I especially love that when you inform them you’ve already tried resetting your modem several times, they ask you to do it anyway (because evidently the way you did it couldn’t possibly have been the right way. I guess there are several ways to unplug a modem aside from just unplugging it).

So yeah… they are sending a “technician” out tomorrow sometime between 1pm and 3pm.

Because this is how shit works for us, I can almost assure you our internet will work perfectly for the duration of the “visit” and promptly start fucking up when nothing can be done to help it. *Sigh*

*****
OK, I’ll admit it: I like to watch Zoe 101. I was lucky enough to catch the last hour of the season finale, “Goodbye Zoe”. This show is terribly and predictably written, the acting is awful and over-the-top, and the show….. just sucks. But I watch it. The show makes me laugh a lot (I’m not sure a lot of the stuff I find funny is intended comedy, but whatev) and it entertains me. And you know what? That’s all I really ask from my TV (OMG, I am so easy).

So yeah, Jamie Lynn is preggo at 16… I am NOT OK with that. But whatever, she’s not the first 16 yr. old to get pregnant and I’m sure she won’t be the last. Cough *slut*…. j/k… sort of.

I’m going to try and add an (or is it “a”??) RSS feed to this blog so all my non-readers can subscribe and get notified when I post something new. I don’t know what the point of doing that is… but why the fuck not? One day (I hope) people will read this and say, “Wow, I should subscribe… oh wait! I totally can..”

Let’s hear it for foresight.

NOTE: I just spell-checked this post and apparently “internet” is supposed to be “Internet”. I didn’t know it was a Proper Noun.

*****

THING OF THE DAY:

From the movie, “Rushmore:”

Max Fischer: I like your nurse’s uniform, guy.
Dr. Peter Flynn: These are O.R. scrubs.
Max Fischer: O, R they?

Fuck you very much.

- Jill.

I don’t understand why I’m expected to pay my bill ( in FULL no less) every month and these assholes can just provide whatever kind of shitty service they have going at the time. FUCK! Seriously, this shit is annoying. I was offline for TWO hours because I had to wait for my internet to come back on. What exactly am I supposed to do without my internet? Read? Take up a hobby? Stop the violence and increase the peace? Ahahaha… no really, what am I supposed to do?

Fuckers.

Okay. Deep breathe.

I woke up this morning to the sound of hubby snoring. Oddly, this didn’t annoy me at all. In fact, I took a moment to look at him and think about how handsome he is. I love his messy blonde hair and big blue eyes.

As I got out of bed and stretched, I fumbled around for my glasses. I took a few deep breathes and headed straight for the computer. When I saw that no one had read anything I wrote, I decided to head into the kitchen and have breakfast (or lunch… I mean it WAS a little past noon). And this got me to thinking.

I like being an adult (or what passes for one these days).

Here’s one reason I especially like being an adult: I can eat whatever the hell I want for breakfast.

I remember how I felt the first morning I woke up in my own apartment. Aside from utter relief at having left a bitch of a roommate… I felt grown up for the first time ever. Feeling my new independence, I strutted into my kitchen and looked in all my cabinets, eyed what was in the fridge, and decided to have a HUGE bowl of Rocky Road ice cream. I grabbed a serving spoon, headed into my living room, plopped down on the couch and found something to make me laugh on TV.

It was such a great morning. I ate my ice cream and silently gave a “fuck you” to breakfast food and vegetables everywhere.

It’s 2008.

This year is going to be different. I am going to be a happier person and do more things that interest and make me laugh. I’ll be better… at everything. I’ll be smarter, wittier, friendlier, and hopefully thinner (no, really). I’ll maintain interest in something longer than a few weeks (maybe this blog??). I’ll be Jill 2.0. (now with “awesome”).

And I’ll damn sure have more ice cream for breakfast.

******
I can’t stop watching this!

This guy is awesome!